Dang! If Mom does not want me for one thing, she wants me for something else. I do not like this. And, I absolutely do not like when she breaks a Maxine Rule—particularly the Leave-Me-Alone Rule: If my eyes are closed, do not bother me unless food is involved. My shut eyes mean I might be asleep or I might be thinking about sleeping. Then, again, I might simply be ignoring everyone. You would think Mom would follow my Rule but Noooooooo! It is, “Maxine, let’s go out and potty” – like I do not know when I have to wee! Or, “Maxine, time for a bath” – like I am going to happily jump up for that one! I sometimes wonder if Mom just sits around thinking of ways to irritate me? I have learned to take matters into my own paws. When I am comfortably curled up on my bed and hear “Maxine…,” I do not move, especially my ears. Twitching ears is a dead giveaway that I hear her. If she says my name again and I hear her walking toward me, I snuggle down even deeper into my pillow and make soft little “mmmmmmm” whimpers. Experience tells me Mom is going to say, “Awwww,” and tiptoe away. Maxine Rules rule!